Grocery Shopping: a how-to by Aly

I have become such an expert grocery shopper it just wouldn't be fair of me to not share my knowledge.

1. Don't ever shop while you're hungry. You will always buy more food if you're starving because EVERYTHING looks delicious. (except there are lots of exceptions to this rule because I am always hungry.
2. Always take a friend, you are less likely to buy lots of ice cream when there is a cute boy behind you.
3. You have to buy TV dinners at the very end or by the time you get everything else you need AND drive home and carry your stuff up the stairs and put it away then they defrost and all the gravy spills over the stupid black divider and into your cinnamon apple sauce rendering the said applesauce in-edible. Or vice versa the applesauce gets in your gravy.
4. Don't forget you have a tiny fridge and you cannot have too much freezer items.
5. Avoid the 5$ movie bin at all costs. You have no self-control and you know it.
6. Monday is a terrible day to pick up a prescription, EVERY old person in BV/Lexington will also be getting their prescription and you might wait a good 25 minutes in line behind a chain smoker and then that will exasperate your headache and you won't be a very happy shopper.
7. The little orange thing on the price tag tells you the unit price and thats helpful to know when you're trying to decide which size cherrios box.
8. Buy your vegetables first, if you're cart is already got veggies in it then you feel bad putting circus animal cookies on top of carrots.
9. Use the wet-wipes to wipe down the cart because Jill is always telling me how much fecal matter is on the cart I'm pushing around.
10. Cart-speeding is not worth it when you run into a Grandma.
11. Park in the back of the parking lot so you can walk off some of the calories you are about to purchase.
12. The parking lot to your dorm is a lot farther that the garage to the kitchen-counter. And you cannot carry as many groceries and remember you have to walk by the cute boys to get to your dorm and you do NOT want to walk by with a butt-load of groceries.
13. Just get the water bottles on a second trip. (which is not advice I follow)
14. If you fold your grocery bags up all nicely they fit in the garbage bag drawer much better
15. Walmart is 20 minutes away. Don't forget our shopping list at home and don't forget to buy nail polish remover when you're there. 
16. It does not matter that Red Lobster biscuits are unbelievably delicious you do not have an oven.
    

-ALC